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Today was a great day! I had the opportunity, privilege and blessing of spending December 25 with my husband, mother, brother, sister and niece. We had a great dinner but the highlight of our time together was me and my sister watching the others play a boardgame called "Sorry." And it we had a BLAST!!!
What's unfortunate is the fact that I had a telephone conversation with my Dad that started off wonderful until we embarked on the conversation about how my husband and I are Christians (he's Baptist and I'm Pentecostal) but we do not celebrate Christmas. In fact, we don't celebrate neither Christmas or Easter.
Something my Dad said in the midst of this conversation was that (in a nutshell), my relationship and walk with Jesus is (and I quote) "immature" b/c I've chosen not to celebrate these two Christian traditions. I was very offended. Particularly because he chose not understand, accept or even respect my freedom to choose which traditions I celebrate and which ones I choose not to celebrate. His perspective came, in my opinion, solely from a place where since Christmas is a holiday that "all" Christians celebrate the birth of Christ then we should most certainly fall in place and do so as well.
I understand his heart, and I understand his point. But I disagree. At this point in my life, I don't see celebrating the birth of Christ (in December at that) and His resurrection as requirements within the Christian faith. It's perfectly fine for people who have chosen to do so and I have absolutely nothing negative to say about my brothers and sisters in the faith who choose to. But does it make me less of a Christian or lessen my relationship and pursuit of God b/c I choose not to celebrate a holiday (for my own personal reasons and convictions) that everybody (believers and unbelievers) celebrate??
Whatever...
We don't celebrate Christmas but we're not against others who do. And we are most certainly FOR spending quality time with family with great food, laughter, conversation and love.
I celebrate the birth, life-on-earth, death and resurrection of my AWESOME Lord and Savior each and every day of my life, 365 days a year. For a person to not understand or respect that is sad...life isn't about being in agreement with everyone all the time regarding everything!
Friday, December 25, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Married...but I Miss Dating!
I just finished watching He's Just Not That into You for the first time and like my husband said...it was a pretty good movie. I really enjoyed it! Granted, I kept getting irritated but I must admit that I'm getting better with understanding that people are different and will handle situations and circumstances different than I do/will/would.
Watching that movie got my wheels spinning as it relates to dating and marriage. Both have their pros and both have their cons but the majority of women will overwhelmingly choose marriage over dating anyday.
Being married for 4yrs now, I still choose marriage over dating b/c (especially from a Christian perspective) you can have the perks of dating w/ in your marriage but you can't truly have the perks of marriage when you're just dating!
But I must admit, I miss dating.
I miss how the guy takes an overwhelming interest in you, and desires to explore every nook and cranny that is distinctly you. He looks you in your eyes and he gives you his undivided attention b/c he knows it's to his benefit to study you, to get to know you. I miss the questions and that inquisitive nature b/c of the genuine interest he has in you, your mind and thoughts, your past, your desires, your hopes, your dreams, your dislikes...
And I'm referring to real, mature and serious men who are serious about what they want in life, especially the woman they make their wife and life-partner. Not the casual dude looking for a good time or multiple female friends.
I miss how the guy puts effort into being companions and truly building a friendship with his woman friend. He listens and is vested in the moment, each time.
I agree we are wired differently but swimming aggressively in our differences...that's just unreasonable. Life is about changing and growing, being exposed, making mistakes, lessons learned and becoming the best that you can be.
I miss how the guy is always looking for places to take you, wine and dine you, put a smile on your face and give you yet another reason to give him those googly-you-are-so-awesome eyes. Men live for our respect and adoration and they forget the things they DID to get those things. But then aren't able to quite put their finger on why their wife no longer has that glow for them like they used to. Or that twinkle in her eye that makes him puff his chest out. Heck, we miss it too!! Men are selfish, naturally. Self-seeking and self-serving...loving his woman is not natural for him. Which is why I believe we are taken for granted so often. I mean think about it, if men were naturally capable of loving their wives, they wouldn't need to be instructed to love her in the way she needs to be loved in the Scriptures!
For every ACTION you can expect a reaction. For INACTION you can also expect a reaction. However, these latter reactions will with each passing day store away feelings, thoughts and even insecurities that pile up and will be released in one way or another at one time or another. And they're usually not good...at least not for me.
I'll never forget what a woman said to my husband and I while preparing for service at a church we were visiting when living in DC. She asked how we were doing and I said we're doing great. And as she was walking away telling me "that's great to hear" she made it a point to look us in the eye and she said "never stop dating each other".
And dating...I sorely miss.
My Glass House
~DLR
Watching that movie got my wheels spinning as it relates to dating and marriage. Both have their pros and both have their cons but the majority of women will overwhelmingly choose marriage over dating anyday.
Being married for 4yrs now, I still choose marriage over dating b/c (especially from a Christian perspective) you can have the perks of dating w/ in your marriage but you can't truly have the perks of marriage when you're just dating!
But I must admit, I miss dating.
I miss how the guy takes an overwhelming interest in you, and desires to explore every nook and cranny that is distinctly you. He looks you in your eyes and he gives you his undivided attention b/c he knows it's to his benefit to study you, to get to know you. I miss the questions and that inquisitive nature b/c of the genuine interest he has in you, your mind and thoughts, your past, your desires, your hopes, your dreams, your dislikes...
And I'm referring to real, mature and serious men who are serious about what they want in life, especially the woman they make their wife and life-partner. Not the casual dude looking for a good time or multiple female friends.
I miss how the guy puts effort into being companions and truly building a friendship with his woman friend. He listens and is vested in the moment, each time.
I agree we are wired differently but swimming aggressively in our differences...that's just unreasonable. Life is about changing and growing, being exposed, making mistakes, lessons learned and becoming the best that you can be.
I miss how the guy is always looking for places to take you, wine and dine you, put a smile on your face and give you yet another reason to give him those googly-you-are-so-awesome eyes. Men live for our respect and adoration and they forget the things they DID to get those things. But then aren't able to quite put their finger on why their wife no longer has that glow for them like they used to. Or that twinkle in her eye that makes him puff his chest out. Heck, we miss it too!! Men are selfish, naturally. Self-seeking and self-serving...loving his woman is not natural for him. Which is why I believe we are taken for granted so often. I mean think about it, if men were naturally capable of loving their wives, they wouldn't need to be instructed to love her in the way she needs to be loved in the Scriptures!
For every ACTION you can expect a reaction. For INACTION you can also expect a reaction. However, these latter reactions will with each passing day store away feelings, thoughts and even insecurities that pile up and will be released in one way or another at one time or another. And they're usually not good...at least not for me.
I'll never forget what a woman said to my husband and I while preparing for service at a church we were visiting when living in DC. She asked how we were doing and I said we're doing great. And as she was walking away telling me "that's great to hear" she made it a point to look us in the eye and she said "never stop dating each other".
And dating...I sorely miss.
My Glass House
~DLR
In the beginning...
So my journey begins.
I realize that it's important that I figure out a way to express myself and to release my thoughts and emotions so that I'm not bogged down and heavy. Being bogged down and heavy with thoughts, feelings and emotions can make for disaster in a few different ways. I must admit, I've kirked out a few times and completely spazzed b/c of such build-up. Well, it'd be easier to just blame my husband but I'd be doing myself a dis-service...LOL Regardless of why it happened, it happened...and it wasn't pretty nor did it feel good. I felt released (if you will) but it's not such a good route to take.
Understanding now that journaling has always been a way in which I'm able to (at the very least) begin the process of healing for myself, I've decided to get back into it. And thanks to technology, share it with the world which was always a desire of mine. I have an Ebenezer (which means stone of help) which was (is) purposed to give anyone interested, a glimpse into my life and journey as a Christian woman. This blog will now serve that purpose! But I won't do away with the actual Ebenezer because of all that it means and symbolizes.
I haven't decided how I plan to journal (i.e. random, topical, series) but I'm excited! Everything I am, you will see a glimpse of that. You'll experience my relationship with the Triune Godhead, my journey in life beside my husband, how I function in a dysfunctional family, my challenges at this stage of my life where I find myself at a SERIOUS crossroads...and everything in between.
Isn't it always intriguing to have the ability to look into someone elses house? This is my glass house...but no throwing rocks!
~DLR
My Prayer:
Lord, be with me, guide me and lead me. Speak to me, speak through me and help me to not only hear you, but to listen and to respond. May this journey that I'm embarking on be blessed by your hand and may I be used as you see fit, hurting no one and offending no one. It's in your holy and precious name Jesus, that I pray. Amen.
I realize that it's important that I figure out a way to express myself and to release my thoughts and emotions so that I'm not bogged down and heavy. Being bogged down and heavy with thoughts, feelings and emotions can make for disaster in a few different ways. I must admit, I've kirked out a few times and completely spazzed b/c of such build-up. Well, it'd be easier to just blame my husband but I'd be doing myself a dis-service...LOL Regardless of why it happened, it happened...and it wasn't pretty nor did it feel good. I felt released (if you will) but it's not such a good route to take.
Understanding now that journaling has always been a way in which I'm able to (at the very least) begin the process of healing for myself, I've decided to get back into it. And thanks to technology, share it with the world which was always a desire of mine. I have an Ebenezer (which means stone of help) which was (is) purposed to give anyone interested, a glimpse into my life and journey as a Christian woman. This blog will now serve that purpose! But I won't do away with the actual Ebenezer because of all that it means and symbolizes.
I haven't decided how I plan to journal (i.e. random, topical, series) but I'm excited! Everything I am, you will see a glimpse of that. You'll experience my relationship with the Triune Godhead, my journey in life beside my husband, how I function in a dysfunctional family, my challenges at this stage of my life where I find myself at a SERIOUS crossroads...and everything in between.
Isn't it always intriguing to have the ability to look into someone elses house? This is my glass house...but no throwing rocks!
~DLR
My Prayer:
Lord, be with me, guide me and lead me. Speak to me, speak through me and help me to not only hear you, but to listen and to respond. May this journey that I'm embarking on be blessed by your hand and may I be used as you see fit, hurting no one and offending no one. It's in your holy and precious name Jesus, that I pray. Amen.
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